Wednesday, August 8, 2007

scars

they are marks our experiences leave behind
memories of times long gone
nightmares of all the pain and hurt
scars like an impoosible stain
they come from the world outside us
as well as turmoil within
ugly and unwanted they remind us of pain
scars both inside and out

untitled

the fine line
between
has been crossed

he blunders
about
red eyed
delirious

she trudges
wearily
slowly fading
ending

together they were happy
once
but that was
long
long ago

now they are
lost
drowning in
depression

like walking on eggshells
like sinking into darkness

they are tainted
beyond repair
stained

all that awaits
breakage
the finalty
inevitable

there is no
chance
there is no
possibility
only decay

darkness
decends
the deepest
abyss

the eggshells
waiting
waiting to
C-R-A-C-K

Missed Oppertunity

Looking back now
The hurt is immense
The grief and the sorrow
Begin once again

Chances forsaken
And opportunities missed
Accumulate quickly
Destroying my mind

Starting last summer
On a trip as a team
I let a tear fall
I let a chance slip

This summer the same
I had my chance to move
But I held back my feelings
To let a friend have the fun

Further back years ago
And every year since
I've lost friend after friend
Not talking things out

Tiny openings given
I left behind untouched
Threw away or gave up
What I could have obtained

Looking back now
The hurt is immense
The grief and the sorrow
Begin once again

lust

I want to feel you inside me
On top of me
Smothering me
I want to be beside you
Under you
With you
I want you
You
Your six-pack
Blonde hair
Blue eyes
Strong arms
Comforting gaze
Warm breath
Sweet lips
You are my rock
My air
My water
I need you
I need you to obliterate
To control
To sweat
To moan
Use me
Exhaust me
Love me

Lust is a sin
But I am not Christian

Silent Angel

she was born into the world mute; dumb
but while her parents frowned down at her, she smiled
although she couldn't grasp the concept of speech
she spoke loud and clear all the same

she slept in her crib, hour after hour, dreaming
her family was poor; her crib was wooden
her parents worried
yet on she slept; dreaming; smiling

growing up she heard taunts and insults everyday
she could never defend herself, never speak her mind
and yet she always smiled
and it was a true smile, one that lit up the sky

at school she couldn't make friends
her peers hated her, feared her
they didn't understand that talking, vocalization, was unnecessary
she was different, therefore weird and unwanted

she her teachers cared, but not enough
in their eyes, she was just a student; like everyone else
but they felt the paranoia and fear as well
they feared the unknown, the untaught; her secret smile

she smiled
through endless days, weeks, months of hatred
she always smiled
and her smile made everything okay, made everything good again

at nine, her parents bickered and glared
divorce was a way out of the mess; out of careing for her; out of loving her
she wanted to cry that day, but the tears wouldn't come
so instead she smiled; a sweet little melonchaly smile

that smile grew up
at fifteen she met him
he was seventeen
and he was deaf

words weren't necessary
that smile saved his life
he was standing on a bridge that day, staring at the water
wondering what death felt like

what had the past seventeen years given him?
pain; an icy sore that had slowly spread
a black fog that had enveloped his heart
death would end it all; make it stop

she saw him; even without words, she understood
she reached out to him
he saw the smile; the sweet melonchaly smile
he wondered if it were possible

they found love that day on the bridge
after years of searching, they found love
they found each other
and they found themselves


words weren't necessary.

Untitled

what will it take to make it stop?
the wars, the hatred, the pain, the death.
when will all of this cease at last?
who will come out on top?

senseless agony as lives are lost,
while over gravestones loved ones weep.
is it worth it? the medals and honors?
will they protect yhou from paying the final cost?

if everyone would simply step back,
to take a good look at all that we have.
and if we could simply overlook the past,
what in reality do we vitally lack?

we have family, we have friends,
we have food, and water.
everything our ancestors painfully sought after.
so why can't we simply make amends?

the world will fall
at the hands of us men.
because of greed and envy and power;
because we are solipsistic, egotistic; we crawl

in our final hour,
as the world around us crumbles,
we will share one thought, one heart, one soul.
each one of us grievously dour.

each one of us will think,
of all the pain that we have suffered.
and yet what truly matters,
away from we will shrink.

hatred greed and anger,
which connects us all as human,
which causes us to kill and maim,
will cause no plight thereafter.

One More Lost Soul

she was five
a stick-thin little girl
with her whole life ahead of her
she was innocent
oblivious to all the war
the genocide around her
she was beautiful
her dark skin glowed under thed sun
her big curious eyes twinkled with delight
she might have been anyone anywhere else
but she wasn'tshe was in DARFUR.

they took her father first
her mom told her he was away hunting
but he never came back
then one moonless night
they came and took her mom
while they dragged her away
she screamed that she was leaving
leaving to find her husband
they never came back
then one daythey came for her

she was fetching water
for her neighbors
who had taken her in
she was smiling like always
but she was starting to worry
there was smoke coming from the village
and loud popping sounds
and screams
she didn't think she'd ever forget the screams
they were begging for mercy
to anyone, to everyone, to no one
she stumbled to a stop

the man in front of her looked mad
but what had she done wrong
why was he so angry
what was that thing around his neck
it looked like a chain of shiny gold beads
they were beautiful
she wondered if he'd let her touch them
or even if he would let her keep one
she was still wondering
trying to find the words to say
she opened her mouth to ask
but she was already dead

she was five years old
a stick thin little girl in Darfur
she was innocentshe was beautiful
she should have lived
she should have had a chance
but she didn't
like so many others in Darfur
and now she's just another casualty
just another body
just another dead
one more lost soul

SAVE DARFUR.

Saturday, June 2, 2007

looking for the clarity

looking out the glass window
i see the blue horizon
i see the myriads of color
the flowers are in bloom

looking from behind the swing
i see the children laughing
for what could possibly be better
than the stopping of the ice cream man

looking out into the distance
i see the mountains blazing
i see the sunflower rising high
to meet the dying sun

looking through the leafless trees
i see a bare, naked world
i see the castles in the sky
that hide behind the clouds

looking deep within myself
i see the swirling colors
i see the confusion of an average teen
that may sometimes lead to trouble

looking for something to save me
i see only an endless abyss
i see no bright light to lead me
only me myself and i

looking out unto the world
i see the hurt and agony
i see how one minute mistake
can be the death of thousands

looking for the answers
to all of life's questions
i find not only none
but many more to wonder

looking for the clarity
i see only the destractions
i see the myriads of color
this time they are not flowers

looking for the clarity
may take me my whole life
even then i may not find it
for i only exist for a moment

looking for the clarity
is something i must do
i take my job quite seriously
and i wish that you would do so too